


MONSTAR

by kewltie



Category: K-pop, Super Junior
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Fandom, M/M, Social Media, Substance Abuse, famous hyukjae, manager donghae
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 20:02:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12196446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kewltie/pseuds/kewltie
Summary: The life and time Lee Eunhyuk--rock god, king of the airport's runway, lord of the tabloid's front page and Donghae's eternal migraine.





	MONSTAR

**Crying over eunhyuk’s cheekbones**  @eunhyukee  
RECORD OF THE YEAR FUCK YEA bit.ly/4vNB2mv “Eunhyuk won big at the 29th GDA” #gda #ilovehimsomuch #soproud #mybaby

 

 

##  **Trending: World Wide**

#kingeunhyuk  
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retweeted by **loverstagz**  
song birds won’t sing @hyukonu  
The king is back wassup world. #eunhyuk #daesang #gda

 

 

 

**leddynari** reblogged  **muse2o**

 

> [video uploaded of Eunhyuk’s GDA performance]   
>  AUTUMN RAIN + SNOW DROP - EUNHYUK @ 2019 GDA   
>  THIS SAVE MY LIFE 

Source: jeweldaily

#gda 2018 #eunhyuk #cry #this was so beautiful #he did it #he really did it #HE SHOWN THEM ALL #AND DID YOU SEE HOW EVERYONE JAWS DROPPED WHEN HE LIT FELL OUT OF THE SKY LIKE A DRAMATIC HOE #it actually mirrors how he fell out of favor# and how his entire performance was basically rendition of his entire career #jfc NOBODY TOUCH ME RN

 

 

 

**Kpopatte**

 

> I’m just so happy that I don’t know what to do with myself T___T! I’m just so proud of Eunhyuk and everything he did to arrived here today! He been thru so much and finally he’s getting the recognition that he deserved as an artist, as a performaner, and as a human being who made mistakes but is learning to be better. And how he made an entire album to it, baring his inner most demons and touched on his past and volatile history of alcoholism and substance abuse, showing that you can fall so hard and far and still still climb back up again and that it’s never too late to turn your life around. I love you so much Eunhyuk!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

#eunhyuk #lee eunhyuk #the king of kings #everyone thought he was done #that he was over #but he said fu think again

 

 

 

 

_[Transcript of the 2019 GDA, Lee Eunhyuk’s Daesang Acceptance Speech]_

**LE:**  I--wow, thank you! I don’t know where to begin _._ Well actually I kind of do. _(pulls out a piece of napkin in his pocket with writing all over it)_ My tyrannical manager had bugged me to prepare a speech in case I win so I wrote this like twenty minutes in the men’s restroom but ( _crumbles up the napkin and tucks it back into his pocket)_ screw it! I never thought I would come back here and get to stand on this stage ever again but thank you everyone for proving me and my naysayers wrong  _(he grins)_. Though I’m sure there are still many of you left that are wondering what am I doing up here and how there are more deserving people that should get this Daesang and if this was a year ago, hell if it was six months ago I would have said eat my ass  _(the audience burst into laughter)._ Well, I still want to say it even now. I guess I really haven’t mature all that much but you know what somebody once told me, I would have better revenge getting you to all shut up by proving you wrong so watch me closely, keep your eyes on me for the next couple of months because I’m going to make you eat your words and you’re going enjoy every second of it.

Ok enough drama for the night and lets get back to the real focus of this speech  _(suddenly turns toward a table in the VVIP zone of the award show, where the GDA Commissary members are sitting)._ Now my manager told me if I didn’t win despite all the records we’d broke in sales and charts this year with ‘Song of Songs’ we were gonna sue ( _playfully winks_ ), so thanks GDA for handing me this award and relieving us of our future legal fees  _(audience roars in laughter and claps)._ But mostly, thanks to all my friends, family, and of course to my fans who stuck by me! And if I went with my plan speech, this is where I would now say this Daesang belong to every one of you that believe and didn’t give up on me even though I gave you a lot of reasons to but you’ll have to forgive me one more time because this Daesang isn’t for you  _(a rumble erupts out in the audience)._

_(he stares out into the crowd, eyes zeroing in a particular seat in the front row)_ You once told me I was a goddamn Greek tragedy, all the glory of Achilles but none of the heroism, and you’re right about that but in your imaginary theater did you ever think that if I’m Achilles wouldn’t that make you my Patrolocus--the one to steer me straight, keep me grounded, and hold me together? I don’t know if I would still be standing up here without you but maybe in another world I would have found a way anyway, maybe Heechul found someone else to dragged my sorry ass back on track, or maybe I got tired of wasting away and feeling sorry for myself. There are thousands maybes that I can think of right now and none of them have you in it but one thing I know for sure right now is that I wouldn’t be the same person as I would be here if I didn’t meet you because it’s not that I’m lesser but it’s that with you I’m better--you make me  _more,_ more human, more me, more alive. Some day you are the only thing that keeps me going. So here’s to the demon’s spawn that is my manager, Donghae, this one is for you, baby! ( _he kisses the trophy_ )

_[camera 3 pans over a man hunching over his seat with his hands covering his face. LEE DONGHAE lifts his head up, face flushed and lips moving, audio failed pick up what he said]_

 

 

 

 

“— _You_ _’re_   _friend with the devil inside my head, I know what he said but I don_ _’t care_ —”

“Lee Hyukjae,” Donghae yells as he burst into the room, flinging the door wide open.

All the occupants in the room nearly jump in their spot, looking surprised and slightly annoyed at the disruption, and inside the recording booth, Hyukjae immediately pulls to a stop and looks at him like a startle deer caught in a headlight.

“Donghae we’re in the middle of a recording,” Junsu hisses, rising up from his seat.

“Shut up and sit down,” Donghae orders, dismissing Junsu’s sputter indignant with a glare. “This is more important.”

Donghae heads toward the recording room and opens the door. He walks inside and close it behind him with a kick, ignoring the curious noise rising from the other side of the two way mirror.

Hyukjae, who had been quietly observing him nervously since Donghae burst into the scene, starts to shift anxiously in his spot. “W-what? Donghae?” Hyukjae says, backing away now. “Whatever it is I didn’t do it.” He pauses reflexively. “This time.”

Donghae marches over him with intent and shoves a paper into Hyukjae’s face. “Read it,” he says.

Hyukjae winces, eying the paper with obvious dread, which makes Donghae roll his eyes. “It’s not another lawsuit,” he scoffs.

Hyukjae frowns, brows pinching in annoyance. “I didn’t think it was,” he says sulkily.

“Whatever,” Donghae roll his eyes again, “just read it already you  _coward_.”

Hyukjae pouts but quietly obeys.

A minute stretches out into a crawl as Donghae watches Hyukjae’s face do a series contortion of emotions, from one of hazarded fear to confusion before settling into disbelief.

“Eleven nominations,” Hyukjae read it off slowly, starring at the paper intently as his hands start to shake.

Donghae grins, patting his shoulder. “You did it, Hyukjae.”

“I’m going to be at the GDA,” he says slowly as though he still can’t wrap his head around it. The paper in front of him trembles with the vibration from Hyukjae’s quivering hands.

Donghae steps forward, invading Hyukjae’s space completely.  He clasp Hyukjae’s cheek between his palms and pulls him closer in, pressing their forehead together.

“Oh babe, you’re not just going to be there, you’re going win it and  _own_ every bitofit,” Donghae says, grinning widely that his cheeks are starting to hurt. “You’re going to make those elitist music critics that snubbed you all those years ago eat their fucking words when you strut on that stage to pick up your awards.”

Hyukjae stares at Donghae for a moment before casting the letter aside to surge forward and seizes Donghae into his arms. “Thank you,  _thank you,_ _”_ he says with desperate urgency and Donghae lets himself be wrap up in Hyukjae’s unfiltered joy. Just this time. Only this. 

 

 

 

**2019 GDA’S DAESANG ACCEPTANCE SPEECH**  
_[VIDEO UPLOADED ON YOUTUBE]_  
**fishstorm**  
1 day ago · 3:32 -  5,231,311 views  
**Description**  
I have been waiting for this moment all my life! He’s so lovely T_____T

 ---

OMFG DID HE JUST CONFESSED ON NATIONAL TV????  
**Hyukjaela**  2 hours ago     
Reply     [Thumb Ups] 962   [Thumb Downs]    
**View all 656 Replies**

 

> Hyukjaela wait is he really dating his manager?   
>  **Jen Kwon**  6 hours ago
> 
> Jen Kwon THEY’RE HUSBANDS   
>  **hyuk4lyf** 20 minutes ago 

\---

Boy, he has it bad.  
**Jack Reyes-Morrison** 22 hours ago     
Reply     [Thumb Ups] 5k   [Thumb Downs]  

**View all 1058 Replies**

 

> Jack Reyes-Morrison that’s bc he’s whipped  
>  **hyukjae’s jawline**  4 hours ago 

 

 

 

 

**EUNHYUK’S REDEMPTION Night** by Park Miram 

A star-studded nights of musical legends and the hottest chart topping artists in the world, we welcome you to the 25th annual GDA on this day January 19, 2019. This year seems to be packed with dramas and surprises at every turn and none more caught in the eye of the media storm than Eunhyuk. Going into the award show with a record breaking eleven nominations in his name and eventually bringing home nine of them, he was the undisputed winner of tonight. 

But this night couldn’t be anymore different than how people would had imagine if it was a year ago when Eunhyuk was still blacklisted in much of the entertainment circle and spoken in whispers and scandalous tone. It started a couple of years ago when Eunhyuk could be book for a show and expected to bring the house down the house with his stellar performance. Even at the time, he still had enough influence and popularity to draw a huge crowd, despite the seedy gossip rags that been headlining the news lately with his name and pictures plastered all over it. That year the GDA Commissary Board had chosen and promoted thoroughly and aggressively of Eunhyuk performing and closing out the show. What started as a night to remember, with a variety of entertainments and performances taking the stage one by one as everyone was waiting for Eunhyuk’s turn, Eunhyuk never made it to the stage.  Eunhyuk’s closing show was abruptly replace by another act and Eunhyuk was nowhere to be seen. 

It would be an hour later when people learned of the reason why, when videos and pictures of Eunhyuk’s nude was spread around all the gossip rags. A former flame of Eunhyuk had sold their sex tape to an entertainment magazine for nearly five million won. The GDA Commissary Board had cut Eunhyuk out of the show line up as soon as they heard about the scandal without any prior warning to Eunhyuk or to the audience that had been waiting for him to perform. The last minute switch had people calling foul and unfair treatment while others thought it was well deserve because the GDA’s prestige can’t be tainted by Eunhyuk’s sex scandal. Eunhyuk lashed back out at the GDA Commissary Board with biting comments on their elitist attitude and boycotting the events for many years, until now that is. 

Who was right? Who was wrong? The industry was torn but nonetheless the continued feud between Eunhyuk and the GDA Commissary Board had caused his reputation do take even more of a nose dive when he lost out awards that he could be winning and zero chance of acquiring the elusive Daesung that had eluded him for years since his rise to stardom.  

Now, he’s back on top of the world once again and his name is on everybody’s tongue. He’s the hottest ticket in town and even the GDA Commissary Board had to grudgingly acknowledge that ‘Song of Songs’ is the best record of the year and gave Eunhyuk the Daesang that he justifiably deserves. From a waning star that was kicked out of the award show previously and blacklisted from ever performing there, he has now regained everything he lost and more with a stunning opener to the award show and eight trophies and a Daesang to take home. The King has definitely return. 

Upon receiving his long waited Daesang interestingly enough, Eunhyuk broke the underlying rules that had long been established way before his time, he forgo dedicating his win to his fans and instead allot his success to his manager, Lee Donghae. The man who is said to be an architectural genius to be able to revitalized Eunhyuk’s dead career and made him an even more prominent figure than ever before. He’s never far from Eunhyuk yet he’s still not widely known to the public except those in the industry and the closely monitor fan circles that devote its time to Eunhyuk. But knowing how Donghae was the mastermind behind much of Eunhyuk’s recent accomplishments and success, with all the time and energy he devoted to Eunhyuk, that dedication is sweet and heartfelt and well deserve. Their friendship is truly something else and how far they will go when they’re together, this unstoppable force seems to have no ceiling they can’t smash. We can only wait and see what they have in store for us next. 

_[shown an embedded video of Eunhyuk’s Daesang Acceptance speech]_

TOP COMMENTS

1\. [+5,672, -1205] The guy literally compared himself and his manager to Achilles and Patrolocus, seriously call it for what it is. GAY AF.

2\. [+4728, - 842] EUNHAE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3\. [+2,967, -232] HIS NAME IS LEE DONGHAE AND HE IS BORN TO KICK YOUR POPSTAR ASS

4\. [+2,094, -42] his speech was 20% trash talking his enemies and 1000% waxing poetry about the love of his life ㅋㅋ

5\. [+1648, -198] sooooooo when is their wedding??

6\. [+1334, -94] … I think the manager either mouthed “Imma kill you” or “you’re gonna get it tonight” in the video 

7\. [+889, -36] I can live without a daesang but i better get an invite to that wedding or i’ll b v v upset.  

8\. [+637, -1] dude kiss the trophy while staring intently out into the audience where his manager is like if that isn’t homoerotic enough for you than i dont know what is

 

 

 

 

_[transcript from the documentary,_ _“Jewel: A Revolution” ]_

**Interviewer:**  So what started it for you?

**Hana:**  The summer I was fifteen I managed to saved enough money and convinced my parents to let me go to the KMusic festival in Seoul and he was one of the opening acts there. He wasn’t even one of the headliners or features act and it was in the early stage of his career so nobody really know who he was. It was a hot crowded afternoon, we were all sweating and bumping against each other in the pit as we waited for our favorite to get on stage so when this  _kid_ whom we don’t know walked out, we booed and yelled for him to get off but he looked out at us, unmoved and unimpressed. It was so stupid and gimmicky but he held a finger to his lips and shush an entire of audience of ten thousands. _(smiles fondly)_ He refused to sing until everyone quiet down and it was just so brazen and pretentious of him to think he could do that, that he has any leverage on us at  _all_  but he stood there alone on stage, tapping his foot and checking his phone as he waited us out. Somehow that audacity of his got us to obey in the end and then he sang this first verse of his single ‘B.A.D.’ and I lost my breath. _(laughs)_ I’m not like a curator of music or anything but I do love music and I know a good song when I heard one. It’s ironic to say the least because i I waited three month and used all my life savings to see J.Cee live at the festival but to this day I can’t recall how many songs he sang or what song he even sang but I can still remember the exact words on written across Eunhyuk’s chest instead.

**Interviewer:**   _(tilts his head curiously)_ And what did it say?

**Hana:**   _(grins)_ ‘You came here for me, you just didn’t know it yet’ in big bold black font on a white shirt and I guess that was true in every sense of the word for me. I’d thought I came to see J.Cee perform but all it was a catalyst for Eunhyuk to own my ass for years to come the moment he stepped on stage.

**Interviewer:**   _(leans back, amused)_ Eunhyuk has always been quite charismatic and bold. In a profession meant to entertain people he was—well  _is_  still arguably one of the bests if not the best and I had the privilege to see him live before in Busan and it was truly a sight to behold. Even when he was on the decline, he still really knew how to put on a show.

**Hana:**  That’s one of the things I love about him, there’s no pretense about who he is. He’s arrogant, self-absorbed, and narcissistic but he’s also determine, assertive, and  _so_ goddamn fierce. I was just a small town girl who was still growing into her own skin so when I saw him on that stage, so confidant and pose I desperately wanted just a drop of  _that_. I guess that’s what got me hooked on him in the first place—his swagger and ability to look forward and take on the world as though it was just his stepping stone onto something better. It was maddening and egotistic but I  _love_  it. I became his fan very quickly from then on and by the time I was finished with high school I was running one of his biggest fan sites in the world. I was nineteen on my way to college in Seoul, leaving my friends and family behind, and had no idea what I was doing in the next ten years but I knew when I look at my phone Eunhyuk’s face would greet me and that was comforting. The constant email updates I get about Eunhyuk, going online to check the new stills of him, and streaming his music to help his chart ranking—those things become routine to me. So even when the world had seem new and scary to me he was my rock, I knew even if everything changes and my love for him was constant and so I made a purpose out of it.

**Interviewer:**   _(smiles)_ And that’s how you co-founded Jewel?

**Hana:**   _(nodding her head)_ It started out with a small group of us who loves Eunhyuk and wanted to show our support of him in the best way possible. There’s already hundred fansites and fanclubs for him so we weren’t doing anything special but we wanted to be proactive as a fan so we did and then it kinda blew up _(laughs)._

**Interviewer:**   _(looks at her intently)_ Eunhyuk has a stellar career but there were times when he had it rock bottom and everyone thought he would never climb back up again. This was especially true after the big GDA’s feud and sex tape scandal the public discontent on him was an all time high and there were scandals after scandals of him flooded the pages of tabloid press. Many in the entertainment industry were quick to dismissed him and dropped him completely but you and the rest of the Jewel Fan club stood by him despite it all.

**Hana:** _(shake her head sadly)_ Yea that was a very tough period for us all: me, the fans, and of course Eunhyuk. I know quite lot of people decided that was a line that Eunhyuk hadn’t just trample on but obliterated and good on them, we shouldn’t feel obligated to support or love people that disappoint us or fail us in anyway but for those of us that double down on Eunhyuk after everything we only renewed our love of him. It only made us stronger and we were even more fierce in our defense of him and in some ways seeing his failures up close he became more relatable me, more  _human_.

**Interviewer:**   _(looks curious)_ How so?

**Hana:** Well, Eunhyuk’s substance abuse has always been widely known. It’s not a secret he held from his own fans so we always had an up close and personal look at his battle with himself.  He had good days and bad day, and when he was good he was rampaging on stage and lighting up an entire stadium but when he was down he wanted to take the world down with him and sink it to oblivion. He admitted in a live interview on Happy Days that he knew he was running himself to the ground with the drinking and drugs but knowing is only half the effort, he just couldn’t stop himself from self-destructing and I understood that. Not personally but I had seen it on my father and aunts all of whom had a history of substance abuse running in the family. I spent nearly half of my life worrying myself over it so when I look at Eunhyuk I see the future I could have had and my father’s drunken stupor face reflected on it, I knew I would never walk on that path. Maybe if Eunhyuk had a chance to see what he’d look like when he’s drunk and high out of his mind he would have find it in himself to stop and wouldn’t have landed himself in the ER for alcohol poisoning that night _(looking sad, like she’s about to cry thinking about it)_. That was the longest night of my life and I’m just some unknown girl who watched Eunhyuk behind a screen. I never want to experience that horror again, to think he could have die right there on that hospital bed haunted me but I thought about how my father was at least lucky that in that regard wherein his battle with his alcohol addiction was a private affair and didn’t have the misfortune of having the entire world see his complete meltdown and have it on record in the annals of the Internet. For Eunhyuk his every failures were not only recorded but were widely reported and recognized by the public and I don’t know how anyone could stand to have their every mistakes scrutinized like that but Eunhyuk experienced it everyday whether or not he choosed to participate in the outside world. I can admit he’s flawed and in some ways incredibly so but I didn’t stan a perfect person and I don’t  _want_ to stan a perfect person. He’s going to mess up and disappoint us but because he’s a celebrity and a public figure so when he fell from grace many weren’t likely to give him another chance because he’s tarnished good now and I think that’s sad. Eunhyuk deserves to have his redemption just like everybody else and I wish it wasn’t just us, his fans, that was willing to give him another chance and hope he can come out of it on top.

**Interviewer:** I think many people would call that kind of defense of an idol like Eunhyuk as blind loyalty because how much do you know of someone you only see a handful of times in person and what you can see through a computer screen or TV? But personally I don’t think it as simple as that.  

**Hana:**  Yea we’re not friends in anyway and I can’t claim to know him fully, but I like to think we’re as much part of him as he’s a part of our life. The relationship between a fan and idol or any celebrity really can be complicated by the separation of public image and private life but at the end of the day they need our support as fan to keep going and we look to them as inspiration, support, and in pillars of our life. _(smiles ruefully)_ It’s kinda of codependent but trying to see them at the best they can be and supporting them in it isn’t such a bad thing. It is when we as fans put these people on a pedestal and refuse to see any cracks on their perfect image that it all goes wrong so I try to keep a healthy perspective on thing and keep my boundaries clear so if Eunhyuk ever break it, I know when to walk away.

**Interviewer:**   _(hums thoughtfully)_ That’s definitely a good perspective to have.

**Hana:**   _(laughs)_ Thank you! It took some deep, deep search within myself to find it.

**Interviewer:** Now let’s talk about how the heart of Eunhyuk’s fanbase: Jewel. So while Eunhyuk’s fans are widely accepted as one of the most fanatic and devoted of all fanbases, it’s hard to get so many of you to even agree on the same thing let alone combine all your effort to create something so magnificent as Jewel that Eunhyuk even made several acknowledgment of it. It’s quite something to see a fanclub that started off with just a group of fans on the Internet soon became something of a poster head of an entire fanbase. What’s that like for you and the rest of Jewel’s members?

**Hana:**  I would like to say we were lucky to get this far but that would be dismissing the accomplishments of the rest of the other members. We had to juggled school, jobs, and a social life alongside our fandom activities and while I would never call it it work but it wasn’t easy at all. Currently there’s thirty-three chapters of Jewel all over the world and we’re constantly growing. We organize fan events, charity works in Eunhyuk’s name, run fan sites and accounts, help with album promotions, and so many of the little things that get overlook because we’re fans. We do more than just block the sidewalk at events, scream at concerts, and follow our favorite artist on twitter and other forms of social media. We do the leg work and commit our time and energy to support our favorite by waiting in line two days ahead for a concert, buying twelve copies of the same album to help boost sell, flying to another country just to see them live, by streaming their song five hundred times, and by spending thousands of Won on merchs that have very little value outside of what we give them and that’s just the start. We’re not unique in this, there’s plenty of other fans of other celebrity that does the same thing but the general public genuinely don’t get to see it that often. And when they do see it though, they call us ‘no-life’ like we got nothing better to do than follow these famous people around all day because we want to get into bed with them even though I can definitely tell you once we’re done with this interviewer there’s a beautiful lady waiting for me back at home. _(winks playfully)_

**Interviewer:** _(smiles softly before sobering up, looking serious)_ There’s always been a lot of stigma being a fan of any kind of idol especially when you’re a woman because people see what you do and they just think you’re an crazy obsessed fan girl. It’s quite hypocritical and sexist that in other fandom like soccer people have no problem with the fans getting emotionally invested in matches and throwing money at their team in support and to have it dominate their life. So while it’s okay for soccer fans to be  _fans_ when it comes to entertainers and the women who make up the majority of the demographic, their support and fixation become something to mocked and belittled. How do you deal with it?

**Hana:**  People like to think we’re fanatics and obsessed but if our obsession make us happier and produce positivity in the world I can’t say I dislike it at all. So yea the majority of us are women but there’s nothing wrong with that because we aren’t just a label of ‘fangirls’ when we’re also corporate executive, engineers, professors, students, mothers, and so much more. When I’m not running a fan site with over four millions member and counting I’m planning my wedding in six months and pulling long hours at my job as a graphic designer at an advertisement firm, which is a skillset that I learned from my years of designing layouts and graphics for Jewel _(laughs)_. I have a life outside being a Jewel but being part of this fandom also make me happy so why can’t I have both? What’s so wrong with having your cake and eating it too? Just because we cry, scream, and laugh over this troublesome man doesn’t make us any lesser person. I have met a woman who has two PhD in biology and had seen Eunhyuk live over a hundred times and when she’s not attending concerts and events that feature Eunhyuk, she helps run the alcoholic anonymous program at her community center that was inspired and motived by seeing Eunhyuk battling with his own substance abuse. She’s so incredibly smart and driven and I wouldn’t have met her if not for Eunhyuk and our share love for him. That’s the thing about fandom, we all come from different walks of life and many of us don’t even live in close proximity to each other but we’re all fans of Eunhyuk and we may disagree and fight among ourselves but at the end of the day we only want the best of him and for the rest of the world to see it too because we know he’s capable of so much more. I think that’s what it mean to be part of a fandom is that you’re not alone, you’re never alone and that we’re united in support of what or who we love.  

**Interviewer:**   _(eyes shining bright and twinkling)_ That was eloquently well put.

**Hana:**   _(grins_ ) Thank you, I guess the practice paid off.

**Interviewer:**   _(lips curl upward into a smile)_ I wouldn’t expect anything less. (leans back and looks at her contemplatively) Now, in the last year we had seen Eunhyuk making dramatic shift in his behavior and actions. The tantrums and outburst that he had been known for has been reportedly reduce and though he’s still the Eunhyuk we all know, I see less and less headlines of him on the tabloid pages, which is surprising but good nonetheless! Eunhyuk seems to have make a change for the better and his career is flying once again and if the rumor is true he’s finally going to drop that long anticipated album we have been waiting for years. Your and the rest of the fanclub faith in Eunhyuk didn’t fail you so that must be vindicating in some way for you guys against those critics.  

**Hana:** _(smirks)_ It always feel good to be right and shut up those antis.

**Interviewer:**  With so much going on in the world of Eunhyuk—a feature show on NSK, him headlining one of the biggest music festival in the country, and he’s going to be on the cover of the February Vogue issue, many are saying this will be his year and I get the feeling that you and the rest of the fanbase must feel it to. So what do you hope to expect from Eunhyuk in the future?  

**Hana:**   _(looking thoughtful)_ Well if this is all wishful thinking and confession time then I guess I want to him to do another world tour and  _finish_  it this time around, I want to see him on stage more instead of disappointed cancelations, of course more music from him since we haven’t heard anything new from in almost three years, and _(her brows crease_ ) and well, I want to see — _(she shakes her head)_ no, all those things are nice and great but at the end of the day his health and happiness is all I want from him. So if he decided to quit singing one day to become dairy farmer or something I would one hundred percent support him on his endeavor and will be drinking milk everyday _(laughs)_ but sometimes I think, if Eunhyuk really put his mind to it hell he can rule the world and I and the rest of the Jewel fanclub would gladly help him do it.

 

 

 

 

“Where is he?!” Hyukjae demands, storming into Heechul’s office in a flurry of coat and limbs.

“Cue the dramatic entrance,” Heechul comments dryly, unperturbed from his office seat. He rocks back into his chair as Hyukjae stomps over to his desk, right hand clenched over something and prowling toward him like predator ready to pounce.

“Where are you hiding him?! His apartment is vacated and his phone is disconnected! And now I got this note saying, ‘On permanent vacation. Don’t look for me, you’ll be fine.” Hyukjae slams the note in his hand onto Heechul’s desk, making Heechul’s pens and papers jump. “What the fuck is that even supposed to mean?!”

Heechul sighs as he levels Hyukjae a look. “Didn’t you meet your new manager?” he asks, titling his head curiously. “I assume that should have clue you in already since you’re  _so_ good at replacing people.”

Hyukjae leans in closer, practically shoving his face into Heechul’s space. “I don’t have a new manager! I have Donghae already,” he snarls, nearly biting Heechul’s face off.

Heechul resists the urge to roll his eyes. How did Donghae even managed to get Hyukjae eating right out of is hand is beyond him. “Not anymore you do,” he says and when Hyukjae looks close to murder he raises his hand in placating gesture and is quick to add, “Look, Donghae always wanted to retire and he was going to three years ago but I managed to bully him out of it because he’s a brilliant and I would be stupid to not use it to the fullest potential. So I gave him to a fucking force of nature name Lee Eunhyuk,” he says, giving Hyukjae a pointed look.

Hyukjae makes a face but doesn’t offer any snarky commentary which is strange but a blessing in itself—which Heechul can safely assume is all because of Donghae. 

“Now Donghae is a genius at what he does and as unconventional as it is, he’s  _very_ good at crisis management and that is a very rare set of skill set to have. I couldn’t just let him go like that and you have been our biggest disaster to ever grace our management company so I made a deal.” He shrugs as Hyukjae scrutinizes him with an annoyed look. “If Donghae could turn your dead career around and get you Record of the Year within five years, I’ll reconsider. He did it in three, that  _monster_ ,” Heechul says, fondness and proud leaking through. Donghae has always been his pride and joy, his protege, the one meant to inherit his legacy and management company but of course that boy usurped that dream quick enough that Heechul is still reeling from it.

“I may be a tyrant, but I keep my words,” he continues, voice becoming softer with every words. “I did everything that I could to get him to stay but once Donghae made up his mind it was like moving a mountain with a shovel. So when Donghae finished his job, I let him go as promise.”

“Why would he even retire?” Hyukjae demands, puzzlement clear on his face and in his voice. 

“That’s on him,” Heechul says, not like he hasn’t try to figure that puzzle of the century. Donghae isn’t even in his thirty yet but he’s already packing up for permanent vacation, and it is as ridiculous as it sound.

Hyukjae lets out a frustrated growl, hands clenching tight at his side as he tries to figure out this entire fucking mess.

“You don’t need him anymore,” Heechul tells him gently, attempting a comforting tone but really imaging he’s trying to subdued a wild animal. “You’re already at the top of your game, your last album is certified diamond and you have a year-long world tour in a month. Donghae went above and beyond the job and duty given to him for you and now you’re going to finish it. He had already handpicked your next manager and--”

Hyukjae reaches out and seizes Donghae’s note once again, crumbling the note in his hand. “Donghae is my manager and nobody else!” he says, stuffing the note in his pocket.

“Hyukjae,” Heechul says tiredly, already feeling a headache forming in the back of his head, “I understand. He devoted three years of his entire life to you and helped you get your career back so you owed him a lot but it’s time to for you let him go. You can stand alone now, you don’t need him anymore.”

Hyukjae scrunches up his face and takes a step back, looking wild and manic and very much like an untamed beast. “I may not need him but I  _want_  him!” he cries out, eyes bright with a determine fire.

“That’s not for you to decide,” Heechul points out with narrow eyes. “Donghae has a life outside of you but for three years he put it on hold and dedicated his time and energy to get you back up on your feet. Now you must let him go and let him live his life. Do you think he would like it if you throw everything he had done aside just like that? What would he even say?”

Hyukjae’s face appears torn with indecision, twisting between hesitation and helplessness and then—and then he smiles, a full blown smile that punch Heechul right in the face and knocks him speechless but equally  _terrifies_  him because he had seen that same smile before Hyukjae set his condo on  _fire._  “I guess I have to ask him myself then,” he declares, and it’s like Heechul had accidental lit something within him that he has no hope of putting out, not without drowning the entire world in the ocean with them.

Heechul abruptly pushes his chair back and stands up. “Don’t be ridiculous! You got a world tour coming up so you don’t have time to chase after a fucking ghost! You don’t have time for this--” he shakes his head, “we don’t have time for you for your dramatic. You had come so far so don’t throw it all away on this whim.”

Hyukjae just turn around and heads toward the door. 

“Don’t do this, Hyukjae,” Heechul pleads to his back. “Don’t fuck it all up.”

Hyukjae stops for a moment and swivels his head around, a manic grin now adorned his face. “Don’t you know that Donghae’s is literally 85% of my impulse control?” And he walks out of there with a cheery wave, taking all of Heechul’s peace of mind with him.

“Lee Hyukjae get your fucking ass back here this instant, we’re not done!” 

 

 

 

_Accessed date Jan 31st, 2019_

**Lee Eunhyuk and the Modern Opus of Lazarus**

By: Zhou Mi                            Published on: September 3, 2018

Ten years ago he was the young upstart that just appeared on the music scene with several chart-topping singles and a highly acclaimed debut album. Discovered by famed producer Leeteuk at the age of sixteen, Lee Hyukjae was an unpolished gem shot up from obscurity to the height of fame.

He was quintessential media darling—charming, humble,  sweet, and amazingly talented, Seoul’s residential pop prince making the streets his runway, and the world embraced him with feverish pitched but it took just six years, a sex tape scandal, and an alcohol poisoning that landed him in the ER to toppled Lee Eunhyuk from his throne.

From then on it was a barrage of drunken papped photos in raunchy night club, news of him getting kicked out of renowned world hotels, canceled appearances and tour dates, and blow out break ups with his fame conquests that kept him in the headlines and on people’s tongue for all the wrong reasons. His very public life became a crime scene that the world was privy to and everybody wanted to know how this train wreck will end.

At one of the lowest points of his career, Eunhyuk opened the twenty annual MVS’s New Year bash three years ago and at the end nobody care about anything in between, not when the most talk about topic for months to come was when Eunhyuk went on to perform his current lackluster single at that time, clearly drunk and high, fell down the stage and walked out of the stage without looking back or an apology; it was a total disaster.  From that performance, everyone from the industry to the kid’s next door had believe that to be Lee Eunhyuk’s swan song to the world, hailing an end to an era and ultimately his career.

But Eunhyuk’s story is nothing new. Star rise and fall is a common refrain in the music industry. There’s no shortage of stories where you’re the brightest star one day and the next you’re a gossip fodder, so why is Lee Eunhyuk be any different?

Yet like Lazarus, risen from the ashes, this isn’t an end to his story.

With new revitalized career engineered by what is probably one of the most gifted minds in the industry, Eunhyuk is now shattering records and becoming the new face of the New Age of Social Media, and the very demographic that had spurned him in the past—calling him old news, generic pop, and boring-- has now embraced him as their idol and messiah.

At twenty-six, Eunhyuk has all but grown up and if this was a couple of years ago many people will say he still hasn’t mature yet but now—now, Eunhyuk is entering a new stage of his life and career and the world has finally taken notice. With sixteen weeks at number one with his hit single, “Autumn Rain”; eleven nominations at this year GDA, and a numerous other nominations under his belt; and re-branding that can only be call an architechal genius,  Eunhyuk is in once again and people literally can’t stop talking about him but this time it’s unabashed adoration.

Who is the architect of this masterpiece of a revival that has the industry rumbling, because while the world loves a good redemption story but nobody wants to believe in the boy that cried wolf. Eunhyuk had served two previous stints in rehab and walked out of it before he completed his 30 days program, so how did Eunhyuk and his team managed to spin his bad boy rock star image around in sixteen months and gave a new life to his dying music career, leading up to what is arguably the album of the year? It’s a story that’s three years in the making and it all started with a young man name Lee Donghae in a drag club in São Paulo.

Read More…

**Author's Note:**

> omfgggggggggggggggggggggg it's done you guys. sorry this should have been up later but i just HAD TO ADD IN A FEW MORE SCENES A;SJA;SJDFASDFA. anyway like i said before this is my love letter to hyukjae bc he may not be my fav but i understand why he's everyone else. ahhhh this editing been SUCH A PAIN BUT LET'S ALL A BREATH A RELIEVE THAT IT WOULD TAKE ME LONGER IF I DECIDE TO TAKE UP CSS TO TO MAKE IT LOOK EVEN MORE LEGIT. anyway thank you soooo much for getting this far into the fic im pretty sure you'e v v v v confused but bare with me guys everything will make sense later \\\\\\\o///. i like to think this 'verse as my magnus opus bc of how much fucking work i had to put into it but honestly that title belong to the 300k monster call cerulean dreams ///o\\\\\\\\. ANYWAY, SEE YOU NEXT TIME LOVELY!!!!


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